grushenka, old warsaw, the others. they're soaked. We have no tight roof on the coop. We're bad chicken parents.
...as of late I am reminded:
- that I am not alone
- that I am just as screwed up as the rest of us
- that "God-be-with-ye's" (good-byes) are hard
- that growing food in the front yard and cooking it in your kitchen can be deeply spiritual if you let it be
- that people are hurting all around me
- that cancer is a bitch and kids shouldn't die before their parents
- that pain is inevitable and joy is chosen
- that peace does not come naturally to me
- that I have a heck of a lot to learn
as of late beauty was found:
- in germinated seeds
- in remembering farm friends
- in Rachmaninoff
- in my ecumenical community
- in home-brewed kombucha
- in a little laziness in front of the TV (not guilt-free)
- in mothers and fathers
- in cooking for 10
- in spanish-speaking 4 year olds
- in reaping an unexpected tomato harvest in an abandoned garden
- in individual faith histories
- in the old, unpretentious, worn-in, comfortable shoe called 'family.'
suggestion:
read and retell your stories.
it is in story that we see God. Our scripture is all stories. It is in these stories becoming one with our own lives and narratives that then experience of God across time takes place.
The story (from my perspective) of february, 2007 when i was kicked out and sent home to rebuild; of November 30th- Grady's birth and the aftermath that followed, the story of when i lived with boys in community eating vegetable lasagna, growing mushrooms, and bickering about dishes. When these things are retold, I am able to see that they are all proof of the Divine making beautiful all that is mucked up.
in the past few days I've gone back to see my stories. I read last years journal entries, blog posts, and letters from friends and from justin. These accounts of my history are the evidence of my transformation and the presence of the One who began it all. You know, I doubt He ever questioned what he was doing in all that time. He knew, didn't he?
thanks be to the God of the past, present and future,
who was, and is, and is to come
shalom
